Funny Drunk Sayings

+14

How come if alcohol kills millions of brain cells, it never killed the ones that made me want to drink?

+13

Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

+7

Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.

+7

I stop drinking but only when I am asleep.

+1

I drink to make other people seem interesting.

+1

A meal without wine is like a day without sunshine, except that on a day without sunshine you can still get drunk.

+1

The worse you are at thinking, the better you are at drinking.

+1

When the wine is in, the wit is out.

+1

You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

0

I saw a notice that said Drink Canada Dry and I’ve just started.

0

I’ve never been drunk, but often I’ve been over served.

0

I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.

0

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up……………………..reading.

0

People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim

0

I don’t have a drinking problem ! If anything, I’m TOO good at it.