Funny Sayings - Page 2
+10A great name for a new country song: If I’d Shot You Sooner, I’d Be Out of Jail by Now.
+9Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell.
+9When you are in it up to your ears, keep your mouth shut.
+9Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now sorry I will leave, I can’t find a brain.
+8Isn’t it funny how the people who want quiet are always the loudest trying to get everyone else to shut up.
+8The word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’
+8Today is the last day of some of your life.
+8There is no elevator to success. You have to take the stairs.
+8A thunderstorm is God’s way of saying you spend too much time in front of the computer.
+7When life gives you lemons, you’d better wait for it to give you some sugar first or else you’ll have some really nasty-tasting lemonade.
+7Money may not buy happiness, but it makes misery easier to live with.
+7Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I killed because they were annoying.
+7Why do psychics have to ask for your name?
+7Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.
+7The sum of intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.